Real Life: I do (but I don't) want to talk about it |

Challenge:

• 1. Communicating in any relationship.
• 2. Communicating when your first language is not the same as your partners.
• 3. Communicating when one partner is living in a culture that is not their own.

All relationships are challenging. All couples deal with communication issues. But add the language and cultural barrier and you might want to invest in one of those boxing helmets to cushion the blows from beating your head against the wall.

I can recall numerous conversations between the Spaniard and I where we thought we were having a conversation about X ? when really, I was talking about X and he was talking about Y.

It can be as silly as 15 minutes describing a wedding cake and still not getting your point across. The difference between tiers and layers? add in flavors and icing and you can run in fondant circles.

But it can also create arguments when you didn?t intend for there to be one. Did you know that he translation of the word ?ambition? is derogatory in Spain. In the U.S. to be ambitious is desired. In Spain ? not exactly. Ooops.

The Spaniard and I definitely went through a phase where we had to be really careful. Careful to explain clearly and presisely what we were trying to say. Conversations took longer, argument weren?t resolved as smoothly, but with time and effort we have come a long way!

I still find myself thinking, ?I do, but I don?t, want to talk about it.? Sometimes I am afraid to rock the boat. Afraid to be misunderstood ? to create an argument when it isn?t intended. To hurt feelings when I only want to be kind.

But as practice makes? better partners? we are getting the hang of it. We now?joke about past blunders in the communication game. Not that there aren?t many more to come.

_________________

How do you handle wanting? yet not wanting to talk about it?

Are you in a cross-cultural relationship? Experience or advice to give??Any funny cake layer stories?

Source: http://anywherethereisanairport.com/2012/03/09/i-do-but-i-dont-want-to-talk-about-it/

sun storm courtney stodden joe the plumber lra lra eric johnson eric johnson